There are two sides to me. I'm either an absolute joy to be around, or I am the devil incarnate. There is no in-between.
At Christmas time, it is enforced that we must try out best to be good every second because Father Christmas is watching our every move - especially now he has that creepy ass Elf on the Shelf thing that lives in the house and reports back to the North Pole on behaviour (wtf is that about?!).
Well Santa, sorry but I couldn't be bothered to be an angel this year. I tried... but naughty is better sometimes. It makes sense that Santa has popped me on the naughty list this year, and here are the reasons I reckon I made it.
Reason #1 - On Sunday, I stayed in bed for 9 hours.I only got out of bed because I ran out of milk and had to pop to Tesco so I could continue my life in bed with endless cups of tea. Now I'm an 'adult', I can't stand wasting my day by lazing around in bed but on Sunday it just felt so right. I made a nest out my duvet and built an empire on the Sims. Wasted day? Yes. Worth it? Yes!
Reason #2 - I ate the last muffin, which was my boyfriend'sI couldn't help this one. He'd gone out to the pub with his friends and the muffin was just sat there looking at me, screaming my name and begging to be eaten there and then. It was Mississippi Mud Pie flavour with a melted chocolate centre and it was delicious. Sorry not sorry.
Reason #3 - I blamed and shouted at my boyfriend for stealing my phone charger. It was on top of the washing basket. Which is right next to my bed.Mitch uses my cable sometimes to charge his PS4 controller so I just assumed he had stolen it and taken it to his lair. He's lost my chargers before so it's easy to get angry and go down the whole "YOU'VE DONE THIS BEFORE" route. I felt pretty guilty when his denial turned out to be true, and the charger was sitting smugly on top of a basket that is pretty much directly next to my head every night.
Reason #4 - I've ordered Pizza Hut every week for the last 5 weeks.And I'm getting fat. But Pizza Hut is so. frickin. good.
Reason #5 - I keep taking the car to work. It's a 7 minute drive from my house.In the Summer, I planned to start walking to work to help me stay in shape, save a bit of petrol money and get some sunlight. Did it happen? Of course not. It's winter now as well so like it's not gonna happen really is it. Hello Winter jiggly body.
I'm looking forward to my lump of coal this year under my tree. Any one else joining me on the naughty list this year?